My Milkshake Brings All the Boys To My Blog

I know the drill.  The writer’s mind starts whirling, spinning around a plot of vicious characters, or piecing words into a brilliant, moving, sometimes even hilarious blog post.  We sit at our computers, typing vigorously, creating magic word porn for the world to see, while often sipping coffee (or wine), eating whatever is closest to our quickly moving hands, and piling wrappers on wrappers a top our already messy desks.

It’s one of those things.  Once we start, we cannot be interrupted, unless that Ding Dong is calling from our pantry, or maybe that bag of sour cream and onion chips…nah…those get the keys greasy.  My biggest vice while writing is hot tamales.  I always keep a movie theater box in my underwear drawer, and before heading to the computer, I grab a handful.  The problem is, hot tamales aren’t good fuel for my brain.  In fact, they do just the opposite.

“So what then?” asks the writer.

I have a solution, and it just so happens to be delicious and nutritious, a super easy recipe.  Don’t click the X yet.  Trust me…this is good.  Disclaimer:  I am NOT a cook.  Notice I didn’t even use “good cook” because I cannot cook.  I was banned from bringing anything that requires heat to Thanksgiving this year. I give you today’s lunch…

My omelette.  Shuddap, it tasted good.

My omelette. Shuddap, it tasted good.

And Tyler Florence's...or the husband's.  WTF?

And Tyler Florence’s…or the husband’s. WTF?


So here’s a treat that anyone, even this uncook can make.  Let’s just call it a milkshake cuz smoothie sounds way too *good for us*.

Things you’ll need…

  • Frozen blueberries, strawberries, or really any fruit that you like (I always get blueberries)
  • Bananas (I like to use the bananas that have started to spot and soften.  I chop them up and put them in the freezer for these…milkshakes)
Perfectly freckled

Perfectly freckled

  • baby spinach/fresh kale (or both)
  • FAGE plain 0% yogurt
  • Sweetener (I use Stevia, huz likes honey in his)
  • Milk (can use soy, almond, rice, coconut or good ole cow’s milk.  I use 0% organic milk)
  • A blender

All of these things can be found at your local grocery store…or even Wal-Mart if you’re brave (husband saw a huge rat in the gardening section yesterday at Wal-Mart while shopping for fertilizer, so we’re pretty much boycotting)

  • Add about a cup of milk (adding the liquid first helps to blend the solid ingredients more quickly).
  • Then add about 1 1/2 cups of blueberries (I never actually measure this stuff)
  • Add one banana (the riper, the better)
  • Add about a cup of the yogurt
  • Grab a handful of the spinach or kale or both, and throw that in the blender (or leave this out all together, but it’s a great way to get some greens without having to taste them)
  • Add your sweetener (if my bananas are really ripe, I go without sweetener)
It should look like this

It should look like this

  • Blend to desired consistency. (bartender trick: blend until the liquid makes a tornado with a visible hole in the middle.)
"There's no place like home."

“There’s no place like home.”

  • Pour it into your favorite glass, throw in a straw, and enjoy while you type
Bendy straws make it more fun

Bendy straws make it more fun

Here’s what you’re doing for your body. First, you replace a sugary snack with something that tastes sweet but will actually fuel your writer’s brain.  You’re offering yourself potassium, which will help you think more quickly while keeping your fingers from cramping.  Your ingesting antioxidants which not only help to slow the signs of aging (who doesn’t want that?) but also aid in cognitive functioning, and are just in general really good for the body.  In addition, if you add the spinach or kale, or better yet both, you’re providing your brain with iron which helps to replenish memory and aids in oxidative metabolism.  You’re getting fiber, which not only helps with your metabolism which is necessary because…sitting at a computer all day, but also fiber boosts your brain health in general.  Finally, you’re getting 23 grams of protein alone in the one cup of the Greek yogurt.  Your brain is made up of these things called neurotransmitters.  They communicate with each other to make you feel the way you feel.  They are made up of amino acids, which are the building blocks of… Protein.  Also, think about it…when you have a good quality meal high in protein and low in carbohydrates, you’re fueled for that writing session, but when you down that Double cheeseburger and fries, you have to pick your head off of your keyboard.

So there you have it, a milkshake that might just hold you until dinner.

Side Note:  sometimes I skip lunch when I’m writing, and this is a great meal replacement so that I don’t crash before dinner.

Side Note #2:  My kids drink these every day, so they’re getting all this good stuff, too, all the while thinking they’re drinking a milkshake.  Score one for mom.